Watty's Rock
|
Norn IronBeing Irish is about driving in a German car to an Scottish pub for a
Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or
Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American
shows on a Japanese TV.
And the most Irish thing of all? Suspicion of all things foreign!
Only in Norn Iron can a pizza get to your house faster than an
ambulance.
Only in Norn Iron do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to
the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy
cigarettes at the front.
Only in Norn Iron do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and
a DIET coke.
Only in Norn Iron do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to
the counters.
Only in Norn Iron do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the
drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
Only in Norn Iron do we use answering machines to screen calls and then
have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to
talk to in the first place.
Only in Norn Iron are there disabled parking places in front of a
skating rink.
NOT TO MENTION..
3 irish ppl die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
142 irish ppl were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new
shirts.
58 irish ppl are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of
screwdrivers.
31 irish ppl have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while
the fairy lights were plugged in.
19 irish ppl have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas
decorations were chocolate.
irish Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after Xmas
cracker-pulling accidents.
18 irish ppl had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit
cigarette in their mouth.
A massive 543 irish ppl were admitted to A&E in the last two years after
trying to open bottles of beer with their teeth.
5 irish ppl were injured last year in accidents involving out-of-control
Scalextric cars.
and finally...
In 2000 eight irish ppl were admitted to hospital with fractured skulls
incurred whilst throwing up into the toilet.
If you're proud to be from Norn Iron, leave a comment!!  
Norn Iron - Love it, or Leave it!
|
fossil-fish
|
Absolutley Brilliant,
but,
do you think we are unique in any of that?
|
Pat Hughes
|
|
Watty's Rock
|
Just seen this again ff due to mr Hughes, no we're not unique, I think this happens most weekends all over.
|
|
|
|